Sometimes when life is busy, hard or we feel isolated, we start to wonder where God is… He never leaves us or forsakes us, but sometimes we struggle to see it. Reflective Journaling can help!
I grew up in a very conservative Christian home where I learned to reflect on life with a spiritual lense daily. If we were scolded for things, there was often a reference to – “Do you think that pleased God?”… and “God calls us to love people so be patient with them and practice empathy.” When good things happened, there was always an attitude of grattitude for God’s blessing. I learned to see and hear God in my everyday life and interactions which was so helpful to a young girl who was often physically alone, to never truly feel alone.
The lense of seeing God working in my daily mundane life was one I have clung to in my many decades. God is always at work, and when I journal, it helps reinforce his constant presence around me and in my life.
I was a high school and college athlete and later joined the military. I worked out pretty hard – which led to some chronic injuries… which led me to be interested in the softer health and mental benefits of yoga. (Some uber-conservatives worry about the influence of Eastern mysticism and how it creeps in… but I think there is some very solid biblical guidance for similar practices of the body, mind, and breath. ) I will write more on this in another post…
For now, all I was getting to was that I have journaled a lot of my life, through deployments, the start of marriage, stepparenting, struggling to hear God’s voice, all of it… and I’ve had droughts too.
I used to record events of the day or prayers and later I developed into writing my feelings to get them off my chest and out of my head so that I could sleep. (a helpful practice). During yoga teacher training, we had to journal daily – usually a set of questions the teacher gave us for the week – revolving around feelings and why and how to let them go. I complied but felt that that type of journaling felt like something was missing. it was mildly empty. good for human reflection but didn’t bring me to a place of rest.
Recently, I came across the Prayer of St Ignatius and his practice of Examen. I felt it to be such a great combination of all the things… the human experience that ultimately comes back to how we are living in light of eternity in relationship to God.
There are many resources and websites that reference his method of journaling. So i tried it…Even when i don’t write it down, i spend time in the evenings reflecting on the concepts (i think many of us reflect on these things). St Ignatius just formalized or organized these thoughts. Its a helpful structure for those that benefit from some guided journaling or meditation or prayer. It’s simple – the basic premise is this:
How to Pray and Journal the Examen
(Taken from an intervarsity prayer journal link above)
1. Place yourself in God’s presence. whatever helps you do this – find a quiet place and still your mind. Then – Give thanks for God’s great love for you. Find an “attitude of grattitude”, if you will.
2. Pray for the grace to understand how God is acting in your life. Ask him to show you how and where he moved that day. Close your eyes and open yourself up to the Holy Spirit.
- Offer the events of the day up to the Lord, asking him for clarity and understanding:
- Is there anything that seems confusing or troubling?
- Are there times of consolation and clarity, or times when God’s presence or providence were
clear? Give thanks to God for that experience of consolation. - Walk through your day in the presence of God, giving thanks:
- What were the day’s joys and delights? Remember the little things, as well as the big.
- What interactions did you have with others? What did you receive from the people around
you? What did you give them?
3. Review your day — recall specific moments and your feelings at the time. Pay attention to your feelings.
We can detect the Holy Spirit in the movements of our emotions. Reflect back on the feelings you
felt throughout the day, both positive and negative.
- What might God be saying through these feelings? (There is a reference for “Soul Words” if you are having trouble naming your feelings.)
- Now, reflect on some ways that you could have loved better, not only faults or sins, but also other implications
- What might be coming into your life? What might be passing away? What is grounding your life? Where is your joy?
4. Reflect on what you did, said, or thought in those instances. Were you drawing closer to God, or further away? (this is where i sometimes cringe at my responses to certain stimuli previously in the day) I ask God to forgive me and learn from those moments.
. Choose one feature of the day and pray from it
- Ask the Holy Spirit to direct you to something during the day that is particularly important. It could be an emotion – positive or negative. It could be an interaction with another person, or a
realization you had. Or it may be something that is seemingly unimportant. Pray about it. Allow
your prayer to rise organically – whether a prayer of praise, repentance, intercession or gratitude.
5. Look toward tomorrow — think of how you might collaborate more effectively with God’s plan. Ask him to show you tomorrow, to prompt you and to guide your responses. If there was a person that annoyed me the day before, i ask God for extra grace and patience and love for them… If i was stressed and irritated, i ask for more patience and consciously try to remember that, whatever the circumstance, Be specific, and conclude with either a psalm or “Our Father.” to help end your time.
- Ask God to give you wisdom for tomorrow’s challenges.
- Pay attention to the feelings that surface as you survey what’s coming up. Turn these emotions
into prayer. - Seek God’s guidance. Ask God for help and understanding. Pray for hope.
- End your prater time with an Our Father, Hail Mary, and Creed.
Patterns
When the examen is done over time we begin to see the patterns of consolation (spiritual consolations: increased love for God, hope, charity towards others, sorrow for sin, interior joy, quiet, peace, movement towards God, a sense of hopeful purpose, not self-absorbed. cf. Sp Ex 316 ) and desolation (spiritual desolations: darkness of soul, unrest, self-focused, desire for base things, lack of confidence, faith, hope or love, slothfulness, dryness, sadness, weight, separation from God, thoughts that lead away from God cf. Sp Ex 317).
Pay attention to these patterns. As we grow to understand these interior workings of our soul, the
spiritual forces that influence us and our own internal responses, we are then able to act in the ways appropriate to those redeemed by the Lord Jesus Christ and grow in the greater freedom of the children
of God.
Fruits of this Exercise — If practiced daily, it is not long before certain effects start to be experienced.
After a week or so the following fruits may be noticed:
a deeper peace within oneself
a greater awareness of God at work in the lives of others
a deeper sorrow for one’s sins and lack of response to God
a yearning to praise and thank God more
a more contemplative approach to one’s life in and through activity
a deeper awareness of the presence of God in one’s life
a deepening sense that one’s vocation is a personal service to the Lord
a more intimate sense of being united with the Trinity in one’s ministry
Give it a shot – and i’d love to hear about how you have seen God working in your life!
